How to Be Sexy - Laying The Foundation

Standing in line at the grocery store perusing magazine taglines, you would think that not a single woman knows how to be sexy. Beauty magazines, which keep afloat the fashion and cosmetic industries, make sure with every issue that readers believe that there’s a new secret to sexiness every month. There’s one demographic, however, that is not concerned with the new sexy shade of lipstick: men.

That’s right; most men don’t pay attention to makeup trends, new fashions, or skin creams. While they may drool over perfectly air brushed pics of Jessica Alba, they love looking at you too, flaws and all. To paraphrase comedian Katt Williams: no man ever said no to sex because the woman had the wrong shade of mauve painted on her toes.

So what is sexy? There’s a lot more that goes into the recipe of sexiness than just physical beauty. Attitude, personality, confidence, healthiness, and more make up one’s appeal. In order to be more sexy, you have to start letting go of the external messages about what sexy is, and focus on what makes you feel sexy and good about yourself. There’s a time to add lingerie and mani-pedi’s, but lay the foundation of sexiness by focusing on what makes you feel better about yourself. Here’s how:

5 Ways to Be More Sexy

• Be your best self. Get comfortable with being who YOU are. What that means is that if you love playing videos, keep doing it, because there’s someone out there who will find that dead sexy. Forget learning how to walk in stilettos. There are many ways to be sexy, so focus on YOUR unique way, and let go of the stereotypes.

• Focus on your favorite parts. Instead of obsessing over your flaws, focus on your favorite physical features. If you have great cleavage, show it off. If you have nice eyes, accentuate them with mascara. Don’t spend all your time worrying if your thighs are too big, and instead draw positive energy from your best stuff.

• Think sexy, act sexy. Think about what you find sexy and focus on those thoughts when you want to feel more sexy. You’ll inevitably project what you’re thinking, so let your sexy thoughts shine through.

• Get in touch with your sexy persona. While I don’t think the media’s definition of sexiness is the only one, I do believe that there are just certain archetypes that people respond to sexually. What archetype or persona do you identify with? The cute school girl? The bad-ass dominatrix? The flirty, power woman? The purpose of this exercise is to get an idea of who you picture yourself to be sexually. Harness that persona whenever you want to feel a bit more sexy.

• Stop comparing yourself to others. One of the most debilitating things to self-esteem is comparing yourself to others. Unfortunately, it’s also all too easy to do. While it’s no easy feat to stop comparing yourself to others, you can start simply by observing when you are comparing yourself to others, and start to recognize what triggers those comparisons. And remember the point above: focus on what’s great about you, and not what makes others “better” than you.