Halloween and Sexual Role Play

For anyone who has fantasized about a sexual role play experience, but hasn’t quite figured out how to actualize it, Halloween might just be the right excuse. Sexual role play is a fun way for couples to experiment with identity and break from their sexual norms. While sexual role play can be as simple as pretending to be someone else or as elaborate as full costumes and scenes, getting started is often the hardest part. That’s because it can be hard for both partners to surrender to the moment and not feel a little silly. So for couples who have wanted to experiment, but felt silly or awkward about trying to role play, Halloween is the perfect cover-up to give it a go.

Ground Rules for Sexual Role Play
Don’t just buy your partner a cheerleader costume and hope for the best. There are a few steps you can take to lay the groundwork to make the whole evening a lot less, er, scary.

• Initiate a conversation. Talk to your partner about your curiosities of sexual role play. Be sure to frame it as an exciting addition to your sex life, rather than a way to make up for a deficit or dissatisfaction. Explain why it would be fun to try for you.

• Get into character. Talk about what scenarios and characters are erotic for each of you. Get an idea of what you’re each into, and decide who you are going to be. Once you’ve picked out a “character,” spend some time alone imagining yourself in that role. Why do you want to assume that role? How will you act it act out? Picturing yourself in your role beforehand will make it easier when you actually start the role play.

• Set up ground rules. What are the boundaries and ground rules for your play? Decide together what you’re both comfortable with and commit to those terms. Come up with a safe word that can be used if someone gets uncomfortable in the scenario. In the heat of the moment, “no” can be confused as part of the scene, so pick something that can’t be misunderstood.

Once you’ve had a good talk (or several) with your partner and have established some ground rules, then the Halloween planning can begin. This is when the real fun begins, when you can start getting your costumes together. Some fairly common scenarios include: teacher/student, doctor/patient, cop/prisoner, athlete/cheerleader, and boss/secretary. The best part about using Halloween to experiment is that your role play can begin early, perhaps while out at a party or while handing out candy, and build to the actual bedroom (or any other room) scenario.