Whoopie School

"When I had sex, I always came too quickly. I wanted to last longer but didn't know how ... Then I started masturbating differently, and I got better in bed."

How to Masturbate
So You Last Longer in Bed

Do you remember the first time you ever masturbated? Think about it for a second...

I do.

I was in third grade and I was in the shower. For some reason, I got the brilliant idea to take the bar of soap and lubricate my dick, and then start stroking it in the way I assumed mimicked SEX.

Do you remember the first time you told someone that you masturbated? I REALLY want you to think about this.

I do.

The first time I ever told anyone I masturbated was my sophomore year of high school. I want you to let that seep in - because it was SEVEN YEARS after I first started masturbating that I was confident enough to tell anyone about it. I told my best friend about it... and I confessed it to him like I was confessing a sin.

Up until that point I had been masturbating in the shower, hiding away and hoping no one would ever find out.

Maybe your story isn't exactly like mine, but I'd bet all the money in world that you have a similar story. And do you know why?

Because, as boys, we were never taught how to masturbate. My dad sat me down and talked to me about sex (albeit a pretty sad explanation), but he never spoke to me about how to masturbate. He didn't talk to me about how to masturbate because it isn't seen as a very manly thing - it's seen as a weak.

But the desire to learn how to masturbate was inherent in me, as I think it is with most men. And if my dad wasn't going to teach me how to masturbate, then I was determined to teach myself how to masturbate.

But still, for so much of my early development in learning how to masturbate, I kept it a secret. In fact, I VIVIDLY REMEMBER the first time I heard other males bring it up in a public setting. I was in the locker with my Pop Warner football team and they started making fun of our nose guard (snapper). They kept making fun of him and accusing him of "masturbating."

Now, whether or not this kid actually did masturbate is not the point. The point is that he was being ridiculed in a public forum for masturbating - something that should be seen as an AMAZING thing to do and experience.

Again... maybe your story is different, but I know you can relate.

So, why does this matter? I mean, why does my dad not teaching me how to masturbate and seeing a teammate ridiculed over masturbation matter to me 20+ years later?

Here is why it matters to me and here is why it matters to you...

It matters because we (at an early age) learned to be afraid of being caught masturbating (it was on par with going to jail). But because the desire to masturbate is inherent in us , we all did masturbate.

So what happened is that instead of being taught how to masturbate properly, men instead HID their masturbating and learned to "sneak in" a beat off wherever they could.

But let's take it a step further... why does not learning how to masturbate REALLY MATTER to you later in life?

The biggest reason why not ever learning how to masturbate matters to you is because hiding your masturbating has caused you to be too goal-oriented - too focused on having an orgasm quickly - and this has over time TRAINED your mind and body to orgasm too fast.

Yeah, that's right. I said it. The reason you ORGASM TOO FAST DURING SEX is because you never learned how to masturbate properly.

Don't believe me?

Then I guess you don't believe that you train your muscles to react in a certain way if you practice over and over? That professional athletes should never go to practice because it doesn't matter? That a child doesn't learn to walk? Surely muscle memory means nothing...

The problem is, IT DOES. Since you never learned how to masturbate properly, you have trained yourself too orgasm FAST and be UNCOMFORTABLE with your orgasms. Try to vary how you masturbate, and you'll find that you perform better when you have sex.

Masturbation Tips

• Do delay orgasm and practice control. While you could probably get off in 30 seconds doesn't mean that you always should. Use masturbation as a way to mess with the point of orgasm, and practice delaying and controlling it. Your orgasm will be much more explosive, and you'll get better at recognizing when you're about to blow your load.
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• Don't beat off the same way all the time. You're going to experience a lot of different sensations with different partners, so don't train your dick to only respond to one command. Make sure to masturbate in different ways, using different pressures (grip) and paces (speed).
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• Don't put your dick in anything that will require a trip to the emergency room. While the occasional melon or pie may fall prey to your amorous ways, don't let temptation lead you to stick your dick in anything that it will get stuck in. There are too many objects to list, so just be aware that your penis will swell while you beat off, so just because you can get into something doesn't mean you'll get out.
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• Try it with lube. By all means, lube up before you jerk off to enhance the experience and create a different sensation. Lotion, oil, and even mayonnaise act as perfectly fine substitutes.
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• Toys are for boys, too. Try using sex toys to add variety and excitement to your masturbation. There are male masturbators, like the Fleshlight, or you can simply experiment with a vibrator or a butt plug.

Jerking off to orgasm feels good, but adding some variety to your masturbation will improve the sensations AND benefit your partner sex life, too. Happy stroking.

Related Link Articles

• Does Penis Size Really Matter?: Penis size causes a lot of anxiety for men, but it shouldn't. Penis size is NOT the all-important indicator of good sex that men think it is.
• How to Spice Up Your Sex Life: If thinking about your sex life is making you go "ho-hum" instead of "Mmmmm," then it might be time to try and spice up your sex life.