Whoopie School

"It never occurred to me that men have anything to be afraid of when it comes to sex. That's why it was so surprising when my boyfriend told me how nervous he was that he couldn't please me."

How Understanding a Man's FEAR of Sex
Can Create More PASSIONATE and LOVING Sex...

...I know what you're thinking.

Men don't have any fears about sex. I'm the one who has fears about sex - hang ups about my body image, fears that I am not going to please him the way he wants to be pleased...

But here is the honest to God truth (and I can say this as a man) - men have a fear of sex. It just manifests itself in different ways than a woman's fear. Like most things with men, a man's fear of sex isn't visible through his emotions - because men repress their emotions - it's visible in his LACK of emotions.

And I am not talking about the typical - "A Man's Fear of Sex is because of His Penis Size" or "A Man's Fear of Sex is because of How Long He Can Last." I am talking about deep seeded PSYCHOLOGICAL and EVOLUTIONARY fears that I bet your man doesn't even know about himself.

...You see, men were born to concur and protect - like it or not. That's what we do... on most days I hate this inherent function of being a man - of course, on others, it comes in handy. It's in our nature to build a family (a tribe) and protect that family - that, sometimes obnoxious, testosterone is the thing that urges us forward.

But from an evolutionary sense, if we are not able to BUILD or PROTECT a family then we are seen as WEAK and we will die off. Let me say that again... if a man is not able to serve his function (from an evolutionary standpoint) then subconsciously he believes he is WEAK and will DIE.

Sound stupid? Don't believe me?

Then think about some of the dumb behaviors of a man that you probably haven't been able to explain. Think about how stupid they act when they are around each other - beating their chests and being competitive. Think of the competitions to conquer women and have the biggest house.

And think about how far they will go - how hard they will work - to provide for their families.

Believe me... this isn't stuff that has been just passed down from their mom or dad... this is in the very NATURE OF A MAN.

It's important to recognize this in order to understand a man and understand where his fear of sex comes from...

So, let me give you some very specific examples of where a man's FEAR comes from - and in understanding these fears, you can make your man feel less fearful.

And by understanding your man's fear of sex, you can help him become more in tune with his emotions and can create a more passionate and loving sex.

Men's Fears of Sex

Fear of Not Pleasing His Woman. You would actually be blown away by how many men I talk to that are frightened to do anything but the missionary position because they don't want to be in a position where they might not know what to do. Most of them have a relatively decent idea how to properly have sex in the missionary position (or... at least, that is where they feel comfortable) but are frozen with fear beyond that position.

How to make him fear sex less: Let him know he pleases you. Let him know that you love the way he touches you and you feel happy when he is inside you. Build his sexual confidence up... and then SHOW him the different ways you want to be touched or where you want him positioned when he enters you.

Fear of Not Being a Man. The last study I read said that 60% of women DO NOT HAVE ORGASMS. Unbelievable... I mean, it's really hard for me to believe. While this statistic is terrible for women - it also means that 60% of men don't have the "right stuff" when it comes to sex.

As a woman, you are probably thinking that men don't care about this - if you're one of the women that isn't having an orgasm, then I bet he seems ignorant of the fact. But remember, men don't show emotion - he has been trained not to because it's a sign of weakness (and what does weakness mean to a man?).

But he DOES care... You have no idea how shameful it feels to not be able to bring your partner to an orgasm. It feels like your manhood is draining from you...

How to make him fear sex less: Unfortunately the answer to this one isn't as easy. It involves you teaching him how to make you orgasm. It involves effort on his part. And even bringing up the subject can be tense and a bit embarrassing for men.

But you have to start someplace. You need to teach him how to touch and please you properly or he'll never feel like a REAL MAN. Which means he'll never feel fully comfortable and give himself over to you.

Just remember...

Understanding your man's FEAR OF SEX and helping him become fearless means he will become COMFORTABLE with his sex and sexual performance. This will allow him to more passionate during intercourse - he'll explore more areas of your body - he will be more willing to listen to your direction (and not just think you are telling him what to do). But most importantly...

YOUR MAN WILL GIVE HIMSELF OVER TO YOU EMOTIONALLY.

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