There are a lot of misconceptions about sex that are passed around the school yard, the family tree, the locker room, the hair salon, and even the church picnic. One of the biggest distributors of sex myths is porn. It’s not the porn’s fault, really. Porn is intended to be in the realm of fantasy, but in a society where there is a lack of good sex education, porn seems like the real deal compared to the dry, repressed, and even false information young people get from families, school, and church.
Porn appears to be real bodies doing the real deed, so it’s much more interesting than its textbook counterparts. It takes a lot of time and re-learning to realize those bodies aren’t so real (and certainly aren’t average), and the real deed very often doesn’t look the way it does on film. And while the internet has created a market for more variety in porn, there are enough porn cliches that have entered the collective mind to create some lasting sex myths. Here are 13 myths about sex that we got from porn.
- Deliverymen and repairmen regularly get laid by horny housewives. Wouldn’t everyone want these jobs if that were true?
- 10 inch cocks aren’t that unusual. Except in real life. Penis size varies.
- Women are hairless down there. Not without a lot of work, irritation, and makeup to hide the ingrown hairs and razor burn.
- Condoms aren’t necessary, not even for gang bangs. Um, yes they are.
- Women want men to ejaculate on their faces. Does your facial minimize pores and wrinkles? Then I don’t want it.
- Anal sex is easy and painless - it just slips in! Anal sex can be enjoyable, but it takes a lot of prep and a lot of lube for it to be anything less than excruciating.
- Women orgasm easily from jackhammer sex. It’s all about the clitoris, baby.
- Men take a long time to orgasm. Only in fantasies do women come in minutes and men last all night.
- Women always have screaming orgasms. Hint: it’s creepy if a man is totally silent while the woman is screaming like a dying animal.
- A man can easily handle more than one woman. Hey, there’s no shame in trying, but there might actually be something wrong with you if you can boink 3 women with one erection.
- Cunnilingus is better when your face is 6 inches from her clitoris, and your tongue is long and pointy. Cunnilingus for the camera is the least pleasurable act there could be.
- From behind is the best sex position. Doggy style seems to be the grand finale position in most porns. It’s not always in real life.
- It’s easy for women to deep throat. Not many women are into gagging blowjobs. Just sayin’.
There is a lot of variety in the desires, turn-ons, and pleasures of real people during real sex, far more than in any porn catalog. Don’t limit your experiences by buying into sex myths that you picked up in junior high from porn. That way, if you ever do come across that mythical ten inch cock or woman that loves facials, you’ll appreciate it all the more.
2 comments ↓
“Women want men to ejaculate on their faces. Does your facial minimize pores and wrinkles? Then I don’t want it.”
Love this! Really, it had me in hysterics.
So did the rest of the list. Porn rules, really it does.
So true, so true!!
Porn can certainly be fun, but as long as the GUY(especially) is clear it’s acting! Obviously many GUYS just don’t get it.
One way to get beyond this?….Ask to see if you can use your favorite toy on him. You know the one. It’s as big as a ruler. It might open his eyes a bit. It probably will open his eyes more than a bit!!
Thanks for a fun read.
Bring Back Pluto
“ONE of THE GUYS” ….but not THOSE guys.
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