10 Bad Reasons and 5 Good Reasons to Not Have Sex

There are a few things women can learn from men about sex, and one of those things is to be a little single-minded about it. It seems that when men are in the mood, everything else becomes secondary. Body odor, guests, the Super Bowl – these things take a back seat if there’s a possibility of sex. Not so with women. Many women focus on all the reasons why it’s not the perfect moment for sex, instead of the one reason that it is – namely, that you’re about to get laid.

I know this because I am guilty of it. I have suddenly “had a headache” when faced with a sexual proposition because there were chores to be done, makeup to be applied, or people to worry about. And I’ve learned that more often than not, my worries were ridiculous, or at less important than an orgasm.

I don’t buy into the myth that women don’t like sex as much as men. I do, however, think that women have less permission to experience sexual desire in its most messy, untimely forms. So I say give yourself permission to get your groove on, and don’t let petty excuses get in your way. There’s plenty of things to consider when it comes to sex, but a fresh pedicure shouldn’t be on the top of that list. Here are 10 bad reasons to not have sex.

1. I haven’t shaved my legs. It’s a lot of work perpetuating the myth that women are hairless, and it’s okay to take a day off.
2. I didn’t brush my teeth. He probably didn’t either.
3. The laundry isn’t folded. It will be more fun to do after you orgasm.
4. We only have 10 minutes. You better get started then.
5. The kids/dinner guests/in-laws are in the other room. Make sure there is Disney/wine/more wine available, and then do it quickly and quietly.
6. I’m not wearing sexy panties. It would be great if every sexual encounter corresponded to cute bra and panty day, but they won’t be on long anyways.
7. I’m not in the mood. Ever. Women’s sexual desire can be complicated. If you haven’t been in the mood for sex in a long time, you may actually need to have sex to jumpstart your libido. Or visit your doctor.
8. I have cramps. That’s too bad. But an orgasm will lessen the pain.
9. My belly looks jiggly. If we waited until we had perfect bodies to have sex, 99% of people would never get laid.
10. We’re not in the bedroom. Great! That sounds fun.

There are, of course, plenty of good reasons to not have sex. Here are a few.

1. I’ll have feelings for what’s-his-name if we do it. No one wants to be in love with a guy whose name can’t be remembered, so spare yourself the heartache and skip the casual sex.
2. I don’t have a condom. Safe sex is a perfectly good thing to wait for.
3. I don’t know where I am. Sweetheart, lay off the liquor and call a friend.
4. I’m about to cheat. Monogamy isn’t perfect; neither are you. But you should probably take pause before you cheat on your partner and consider the consequences, and why cheating is appealing to you in the first place.
5. I have a headache. It’s perfectly fine to not be in the mood. Or to opt for reading another chapter in your book or getting an extra 30 minutes of sleep.

Sex isn’t only the stuff of fairytales and romances; it can be messy, spontaneous, imperfect … and still a really good time. Don’t let worry over imperfections keep you from experiencing sex in all its forms.